The difficulty of being a parent

Yesterday night, Kat wanted to go downstairs to see his mother who was making milk for them. Jane accompanied her down and I said I wanted to make sure Kat is safe. She's 2.5 year old after all and going down our stairs can be dangerous. They both didn't like me coming along and whined about it but I insisted. Then Jane shouted at me to "go back into the room". That pissed me off! I told her straight that I am your father and you don't shout and order me around. If anything, YOU should be going back to the room and I stormed downstairs.

I don't know where she learned this from. It's obviously not from me nor my wife. We don't order them to bed or to the room. As I sounded my frustration to my wife over such a incredulous tantrum, she said that she obviously learned it from somewhere (school or TV or something) and that she doesn't know whether it is wrong or right and it is our job as parents to educate her that shouting and ordering father back to room is wrong.

That took me aback. Here I was thinking how rude and impossible Jane was and here my wife is saying she doesn't know that she is wrong and is just mimicking something she learned in the Tv or observed someone else doing it.

But how can I show her what is right and what is wrong when I am obviously pissed at her for saying such things!

Parenting can be really hard! Seriously.. why do people want to have kids???